squirrel!

  

I come from a long line of folks with limited attention spans. Once, a friend of mine pointed-out that my family never let me finish a sentence at the dinner table. “I felt bad for you,” he said, “They just kept cutting you off. You never got out a full sentence.” He was one of my best friends in college, and had the displeasure of accompanying me to my parents’ house one weekend. 

Nowadays, the toxic psychos are out of my life, but the ADD residue lingers. A neighbor once witnessed me cleaning my apartment. “You clean with A.D.D.,” he said. 

“What? No, it’s Lysol foam bleach,” I replied, very “blondely.” “I got it from BJs Wholesale last weekend. Oh —remind me I need to get papertowels…” 

“No,” he laughed. “A.D.D. — Attention Deficit Disorder. That’s you. That’s what I call it when the person starts cleaning in one room, then somehow ends up in another room. You need to finish cleaning one room before you move on to the next or you’ll never get anything done.” 

“I do finish cleaning some rooms,” I attempted. “I usually get the kitchen done. Oh my God my toast! My toast is burning!” 

When youre going through a divorce, commuting long hours to and from work, and working in side projects for extra cash, theres a good chance that focusing on one task wont be your forte. Gotta cut yourself a break, really. You’re doing the best you can. 

One of my Instagram followers replied in the comments that this Someecard totally represented her, and added one of my favorite lines from the Disney movie, Up: “Squirrel!” And yes, she hit the nail on the head. If you havent seen the movie, at least YouTube the scene. I’d post it here but oooh look, ice cream…

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